"...they are concepts defined not positively, in terms of their content, but negatively by contrast with other items in the same system. What charaterizes each most exactly is being whatever the others are not." ~Saussure, "Course in General Linguistics"
Meaning gets its value not by what something is, but rather by what it is not. A bush is a bush because it is not a tree or a flower. This can be clearly seen in binary opposites. What give hot its value? Hot has no value if it is just hot. Hot cannot produce hot without cold. Hot is hot because it is not cold and cold is cold because it is not hot. And it is here that value is generated.
As humans we tend to garner meaning and value in binary opposites. We are awake because we are not asleep. We are hungry because we are not full. We are living because we are not dead. We feel love because we do not feel hate.
We are happy because we are not sad. And we hurt because we have lost that which caused joy...
"I've built walls, a fortress deep and mighty, that none may penetrate. I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain...I am a rock. I am an island."
How I long to champion these words and live by them. I want to be that rock, that island. To runaway and hide from all hurt and pain and that which causes it all. I don't know how many times I have listened to this song and wanted to bury myself deep within it and escape all feeling--feelings that I do not know how to deal with. It is this desire that creates an undeniable sense that I need to runaway. That is my defense against hurt and confrontation. Sometimes, I feel that if only I had the backbone to be that island, to run so far from everything, I could stand on my own with my defenses impenetrable and nothing could harm me again and these feelings would never have to be dealt with.
"I have my books and my poetry to protect me. I am shielded in my armor, hiding in my room, safe within my womb. I touch no one and no one touches me."
As humans we tend to garner meaning and value in binary opposites. We are awake because we are not asleep. We are hungry because we are not full. We are living because we are not dead. We feel love because we do not feel hate.
We are happy because we are not sad. And we hurt because we have lost that which caused joy...
"I've built walls, a fortress deep and mighty, that none may penetrate. I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain...I am a rock. I am an island." How I long to champion these words and live by them. I want to be that rock, that island. To runaway and hide from all hurt and pain and that which causes it all. I don't know how many times I have listened to this song and wanted to bury myself deep within it and escape all feeling--feelings that I do not know how to deal with. It is this desire that creates an undeniable sense that I need to runaway. That is my defense against hurt and confrontation. Sometimes, I feel that if only I had the backbone to be that island, to run so far from everything, I could stand on my own with my defenses impenetrable and nothing could harm me again and these feelings would never have to be dealt with.
"I have my books and my poetry to protect me. I am shielded in my armor, hiding in my room, safe within my womb. I touch no one and no one touches me."
But for once, the thought of running away from it all, regardless of the hurt or pain, is not an option. What I have come to realize is that the hurt only has value because of the joy and love I have felt from the people in my life. To not have this hurt means that I would not have had that joy. And I know that these feelings are fleeting. Just as the night must at sometime turn into day, this too will pass and life will continue. There will be happiness and joy and light and sun. There has to be.
"I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died. If I never loved, I never would have cried."
The thought of living in a world without friendships, without happiness, without love, without hope, is unbearable. So for the sake of having a life full of joy and happiness and for those feelings to have value and meaning, I will take all the hurt and pain that this world has to offer for the greater the hurt, the greater the joy has been. And for that reason, I welcome those feelings with open arms.
I will not...no...I cannot runaway anymore. No matter how much hurt there is, it's not an option.
"I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died. If I never loved, I never would have cried."
The thought of living in a world without friendships, without happiness, without love, without hope, is unbearable. So for the sake of having a life full of joy and happiness and for those feelings to have value and meaning, I will take all the hurt and pain that this world has to offer for the greater the hurt, the greater the joy has been. And for that reason, I welcome those feelings with open arms.
I will not...no...I cannot runaway anymore. No matter how much hurt there is, it's not an option.
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